This week has been tough to get through due to my ex-partner’s continuing ridiculous and pathetic demands. However, I am finally in a place where I won’t allow it to affect me the way it always used to.
Last year felt as if I was constantly dodging bullets from him. This year, however, I am finally free of his influence on me.
After 15 years of the hell that he put me through, I can finally see the light at the end of the tunnel which I had previously thought I would never find a way out of. Well that light is now shining brighter and brighter, so that now all I can do is move towards it and further away from all the pain he deliberately inflicted upon me. I have finally found myself and my happy place again!
Please don’t misunderstand me. This has been a LONG journey and, at times, I wasn’t even capable of seeing it. But it has slowly been dawning on me that the more I get out there and allow my light to shine, the more I believe in myself. Now I know I ‘can’ and ‘will’ do this for me!
That is something which a narcissist will take away from you. When you are finally free from this relationship. You will slowly, sometimes very slow, but surely find yourself again. ‘Hope’ is something which they took from you. This leads to despair and you find it hard to believe that you will ever have it again. But the truth is that if you allow yourself all the time you need to heal, then ‘hope’ and ‘your’ life and ‘your’ future will gradually return. This is a wonderful revelation that will become stronger and stronger as you face each day. The ‘fog’ which you have been living in for so many years begins to clear and you can finally see things as they really are and not the false/fake, depressing reality which your Narcissist forced you to accept as your lot.
One thing is certain, you will never again allow anyone to degrade, humiliate or destroy your self-worth ever again,
Do the things you used to love, try new things that may scare you at first. Let the day be yours, not belong to someone who simply wants to dim your light and you will eventually begin to feel your self-worth and confidence in yourself begin to return.
When I’m having a tough time finding the motivation to do things which may now scare me, I ‘feel the fear’ and do them anyway! I promise you that each step you take towards yourself, is a step further away from your abuser and eventually, the only regret you will have is that you didn’t escape from this control sooner. You have one life and it is a gift which ‘you’ have been given. It was never intended for someone else to take away from you. You will see ‘Red Flags’ from a mile away and will avoid them like the plague because that is exactly what you need to do to find happiness and balance in your life again.
Be proud that each small accomplishment you achieve is going to lead to more and more positivity in your life!
Eventually, you will see that relationship was a nightmare that is now over and you have awoken to a brand new world of possibilities!
Next post will be published on Wednesday 22nd May!
Drag Me Down Blog 